TimeTravel
We had the Memorial Service for my Grandma on Sunday.
It was amazing.
Seeing people from my past. So many. And after the initial scrutiny ("Oh, she's so thin now" or "he's almost bald!"), we timewarped back to where we were when we knew each other best.
Only someone who has actually done this will understand: Age is physical only.
I was 18 with Terry Walker, listening to him practice his eulogy backstage. He was 30ish. We were back in the days of the '84 Olympics and staying with Nana when Gram was in China.
I was 12 with Phyllis Cohen, 13 with Robin, 17 with Afton and 20 with Gina, and a mere 8 with Sandy Wildman. Not even the names really change- Sandy has been a "Padnos" for something like 20 years.
For a few hours on a sunny Sunday afternoon, we were all young again.
And it was strange and wonderful.
And part of me wishes I could go back to those days.
Oh, say, 1983. Not quite out of high school, but not so early in the game that I have to take Algebra II again.
To only have to worry about whether I can get my Mom to let me go see a midnight movie in Westwood with my friends (she never did). To be responsible for keeping my room clean, and doing the dinner dishes once a week--- and that's all.
What was I complaining about?
What would I do differently?
Well, I'd love it more.
I mean, I'd consciously tell myself to hang on to the moments I cherish now. To look more closely. Smell more deeply. Burn the impression into my mind more completely.
I'd spend more time with Dad and John and Nana, and less time with... well, let's just say there are people that I probably wasted some valuable time on.
I'd go to college sooner and longer, and sleep a little less.
I'd take Gram to Disneyland more often, and spend a lot less time worrying.
I'd save some of those albums I got rid of when I thought I really only needed CDs.
I'd hold all the babies longer, and listen to the older people with much more patience.
I'd play more, and not be so concerned with how mature I was.
I'd diet less, but eat better.
I'd read just as much, but watch a lot less TV.
I'd listen more.
And talk less.
And breathe in every moment in the big blue house.
I'm having an "Our Town" moment.
We don't-we can't- appreciate it enough, can we? Not while we're in it- really living it?
Ok- so what would I do the same?
I'd marry the same man all over again.
I'd hang out with Tracy and Gina and Vicki, and both Robins.
I'd sit with Nana after breakfast.
I'd ask Gram questions about our family, and remember all the answers.
I'd spend Dad's last year helping to care for him.
I'd have my babies.
What would YOU do differently?
What would you do the SAME?
It'll keep you up nights.
It was amazing.
Seeing people from my past. So many. And after the initial scrutiny ("Oh, she's so thin now" or "he's almost bald!"), we timewarped back to where we were when we knew each other best.
Only someone who has actually done this will understand: Age is physical only.
I was 18 with Terry Walker, listening to him practice his eulogy backstage. He was 30ish. We were back in the days of the '84 Olympics and staying with Nana when Gram was in China.
I was 12 with Phyllis Cohen, 13 with Robin, 17 with Afton and 20 with Gina, and a mere 8 with Sandy Wildman. Not even the names really change- Sandy has been a "Padnos" for something like 20 years.
For a few hours on a sunny Sunday afternoon, we were all young again.
And it was strange and wonderful.
And part of me wishes I could go back to those days.
Oh, say, 1983. Not quite out of high school, but not so early in the game that I have to take Algebra II again.
To only have to worry about whether I can get my Mom to let me go see a midnight movie in Westwood with my friends (she never did). To be responsible for keeping my room clean, and doing the dinner dishes once a week--- and that's all.
What was I complaining about?
What would I do differently?
Well, I'd love it more.
I mean, I'd consciously tell myself to hang on to the moments I cherish now. To look more closely. Smell more deeply. Burn the impression into my mind more completely.
I'd spend more time with Dad and John and Nana, and less time with... well, let's just say there are people that I probably wasted some valuable time on.
I'd go to college sooner and longer, and sleep a little less.
I'd take Gram to Disneyland more often, and spend a lot less time worrying.
I'd save some of those albums I got rid of when I thought I really only needed CDs.
I'd hold all the babies longer, and listen to the older people with much more patience.
I'd play more, and not be so concerned with how mature I was.
I'd diet less, but eat better.
I'd read just as much, but watch a lot less TV.
I'd listen more.
And talk less.
And breathe in every moment in the big blue house.
I'm having an "Our Town" moment.
We don't-we can't- appreciate it enough, can we? Not while we're in it- really living it?
Ok- so what would I do the same?
I'd marry the same man all over again.
I'd hang out with Tracy and Gina and Vicki, and both Robins.
I'd sit with Nana after breakfast.
I'd ask Gram questions about our family, and remember all the answers.
I'd spend Dad's last year helping to care for him.
I'd have my babies.
What would YOU do differently?
What would you do the SAME?
It'll keep you up nights.
posted by jules @ 11:29 AM
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